Topic : Yet to be known

Hello !

23.01.2026

 I went out somewhere to find a little peace and calm.

At around 11:00 a.m., GN’s father and I went to the airport to pick up GN. I had already heard from him on a phone call that he would be coming from UP to Imphal three days earlier than expected.

After picking him up from the airport, we went to his maternal house. There was an occasion at their place, and his parents warmly asked me to join them for a meal. I felt shy at first, but I accepted their invitation and ate with them. The food tasted really good, and the atmosphere felt welcoming.

Later, his father dropped me home around 1:30 p.m. Once I reached home, I went straight to bed, opened Spotify and YouTube, listened to some songs, and soon fell asleep for a short while.

At around 5:00 p.m., I went to attend one of my high school colleague’s wedding ceremonies at Wangkhei. After that, we all gathered at the groom’s house. I met many friends whom I had not seen for years, and the moment felt truly amazing. We stayed until late night, and just before midnight, we decided to leave.

SL, LK, AH, RT, and I went to Moirangkhom along with a few other friends. We spent time talking and drinking tea, coffee, and lemon tea. I started feeling sleepy, so I rested at the back seat of SL’s car. They dropped me home around 2:00 a.m.

24.01.2026

 I slept only for a few hours and woke up at 5:00 a.m., still wearing the previous day’s clothes. I continued my routine like that, half-aware and half-laughing at myself.

My mother had been going frequently to Mabok’s house to help with household work and to take care of Bachou, who was undergoing dialysis. Their only daughter, ChiChe, was in Delhi for training, while their two sons were not in Manipur. The elder son was in Eastern India, and the second son was abroad. Despite being the youngest and holding a respectable position in the GoM, ChiChe had always taken responsibility for the family and household with dedication(she is not married yet).

I called BT and asked him if he wanted to eat chicken together. He replied on the phone, “Okay, mate, I’m coming.” We went to Yumsha Chicken at Keimshamthong and bought one kilogram of chicken. My brother cooked the food, BT played games, and I took the chance to wash my clothes. When I am alone, I feel lazy, but when people are around, I somehow find the energy to do things.

After spending a few hours together, BT left.

At night, I stayed over at GN’s house to relax. We talked about many things and listened to songs until late at night.

25.01.2026

I woke up early, washed up, got dressed, and left GN’s house quietly because he was still sleeping. It was very early, and the cold air felt sharp.

At around 9:30 a.m., GN called me and invited me to have a meal with him. He had duck curry prepared, but I felt indolent and lethargic, so I told him that I was busy.

I went straight back to bed and listened to songs, as usual. However, I could not fall asleep. My thoughts wandered toward my daily routine and my career. My mind felt confused and blank, reminding me of that viral meme, “My brain is not braining,” which made me smile.

At around 5:00 p.m., BT called and asked if I was free. He suggested that we meet at Khwairamband Bazaar. He came with his girlfriend, and we met and had tea at a nearby hotel. The evening lights and the streets near Ima Market looked beautiful and lively.

While walking around, I noticed clips, ribbons, and other accessories used by women. Something suddenly came to my mind, and I bought a small clip, even though I am not good at choosing such items.

While I was with them, GN called and asked me to buy macaroni from Moirang Leirak near Mother Care Hospital. After spending a little more time with BT and his girlfriend, I left, bought the macaroni, and went to GN’s house with my brother. We had dinner with GN’s sister. Since it was late, my brother left, but I stayed over at GN’s house. I told his sister to wake up early the next morning because it was Republic Day and we planned to watch the event.

26.01.2026

 I woke up, brushed my teeth, and Pipi served me Maggi and tea. After eating, we went out to watch the Republic Day celebrations.

GN asked me to stay back and eat lunch at his house, but I refused, saying that I was busy, even though I actually had no urgent work. He dropped me home.

I did some work at home, but I did not feel like staying indoors. I called GN and told him to wait for me, saying that I would come back and eat together.

As I was about to leave the house, my mama said to me, “Yesterday, I cooked hilsa, your favourite fish, thinking you’d eat it. If you don’t want to eat it at home, you can take it and eat it at your friend’s house also added nowadays, you’re hardly at home, and you’re not studying.” I did not reply, but her words affected me deeply. I went out quietly, bought some fried chicken, and ate with GN. He said the chicken tasted very good.

I stayed for a few hours, returned home late, and completed some personal work.

In the evening, LL and BT called me and invited me to have chicken curry at our house. We ate together happily. Being with them gave me a small moment of comfort and joy.

After dinner, BT and LL left. I also left around 9:00 p.m. and went to GN’s house, where I stayed another night.

27.01.2026

 I woke up early and returned home. Later, I walked to the bazaar and ate bora and chapati.

BT and LL had called earlier regarding some planned work. They picked me up from the bazaar, and we went to a vehicle showroom at Mantripukhri. After that, we visited JNIMS Hospital because my night-walking partner AK’s mother had been admitted due to illness. We stayed for a short time and then left.

Later, we went to DMU for LL’s form filling. After that, LL and I dropped BT. Suddenly, my brother called and asked me to buy medicine because he was feeling cold and experiencing pain. LL and I went to a pharmacy in our leikai, bought the medicine, and then LL dropped me home around 4:00 p.m.

That night, I again stayed over at GN’s house.

28.01.2026

 I skipped my colleague’s Mangani Chakouba and another feast because I already had plans.

My brother and I went to PHC Sagolband near Killing Field Lampak because he was unwell. After examination, the doctor said that my brother had chickenpox and prescribed medication. We also decided to do some tests available at the PHC.

Wishing my brother a speedy recovery. Your health means so much to me. From September to November last year, you and Mama were ill and tested positive for dengue, which made me very sad. Now that you are unwell again, I feel worried. How can I live peacefully when you all are sick? Last year, in October, the stress and tension I experienced during that time caused me to lose a part of my life. Please take care, bro.

At around 1:30 p.m., I went to Langjing. A person who always motivates me, understands my aggressive nature, and also knows my inner self cooked pork for me. We ate together, and the food tasted extremely good. I sincerely wished you the best in life.

I had not eaten meat for nearly thirty days due to a death in our sagei.

29.01.2026

 I bought duck curry and ate it with GN at his house.

After returning, I went to the PHC to collect reports and then came back home.

Feeling bored, I called BT and asked if he was free. He arrived around 1:35 p.m. We went to one of his friends’ places to distribute invitation cards, though I was not sure what the cards were for. After that, we visited a cyber agency related to passport work. Later, we went to JNIMS Hospital to inquire about my friend’s mother’s health.

On the way back, we laughed so much that we could barely speak, joking continuously until our stomachs hurt.

30.01.2026

It was GN’s last day in Imphal before leaving for Delhi.

As I stepped out of the house, my mother once again said, “You are not studying for many months. What have you been doing?” I did not respond and told her that I was going to GN’s house, as he would be leaving that day.

At his house, his mother cooked a meal for us. I suggested buying meat curry, but GN refused, saying that it was unnecessary. Instead, we ate OK rolls and Nga Ataoba Thongba prepared by his mother.

We talked for some time, and then I left, wishing him well, as there was not enough time left. 

At around 6:46 pm, I had a KFC bucket that was given to me by a trusted and lovable person, and it tasted better than usual(KFC was celebrating its 15th anniversary in Northeast India).

At around 8:00 p.m., since my brother was unwell, my mother, BT, and I went to attend a wedding ceremony of my brother’s office staff to give poyeng, as instructed by my brother.

BT and I joked a lot that day and even invented a funny word called “confusion.” We laughed endlessly. Later, we went to a coffee shop at Kwakeithel and drank lemon tea. We do not drink alcohol or smoke. After that, we returned home, shook hands, and said goodbye, promising to meet again.

31.01.2026

I woke up very early at around 4:00 a.m., but my alarm did not work, probably because I am too good at sleeping. BT called me and woke me up, as we had some work planned and also needed to meet a friend. There was an event organised by COCOMI related to Manipur gi Shaktam Kaiba Yaroi.

BT, my brother, and I went out early, even before sunrise. The place we visited was astonishing and deeply beautiful. I loved it and captured a few scenic photographs. We returned home around 8:50 a.m.

After reaching home, BT asked me, “Gagu, why don’t you stay at your house these days?” I replied, “I don’t know.” He advised me not to continue like this, but I changed the topic.

Before leaving, he said we should meet again soon. We shook hands, and he left.

01.02.2026

I had thought of writing all this earlier but could not complete it. Today, I finally wrote everything and shared it.

I know that eating meat frequently these days is not good. However, I lost a significant amount of weight in December and until mid-January. So whenever I feel like eating and when I am with friends, I take the opportunity to eat.

Also, thanks to my friends KM and JN. We do video calls for more than two hours, talk random things, laugh, and joke whenever I feel low.

KM, you helped me with Microsoft Excel and other work. Thanks a lot, mate, especially when I could not handle things or did not have the energy to do them.

 Lastly, thanks to one of my friends, MK. We support and motivate each other.

You are also in a lot of pain, but your time will come, and everything you are facing will pass. Keep surviving.

Note: I have never shared my story of how I became this way with anyone exactly.

"This is a real-life moment. I feel low and drained. I do not know where to go. I feel stuck and keep procrastinating, but I am still trying to survive.

Let us survive to live."

Hello readers, I hope you all are doing well,

and I wish you a very Happy February (month of love & also my important month) !