A quiet past

  There was a time during my high school days when life felt simple. Responsibilities were few, and the future felt far away. Everything changed after my father passed away. His death became a turning point in my life, and slowly a mobile game called Clash of Clans became my escape from reality.

Before my father’s death, my evenings followed a beautiful and disciplined routine. Every night, after returning from Khwairamband Bazar, my father would sit beside me and teach me Science at home. My parents ran shops there, selling jewellery, dress and other items. No matter how tired my father was, he always made time for my studies. Those nights were filled with care, patience, and guidance. Even today, when I think about them, it feels like those moments are still alive somewhere.

After my father passed away, the discipline and direction he brought into my life slowly faded. I lost interest in my studies and found it difficult to concentrate. The house felt quiet and heavy. My unmarried aunt, who had lived with us from the beginning, stepped in and took care of my brother and me until her own death. I can never forget her love. Every night after dinner, she told us stories, looked after us, and tried to keep warmth and comfort alive in our home. I miss her deeply. She is gone now too, but she lives in my heart every single second. After that, it was only my mother, my brother, and me, three people trying to survive and move forward together.

During that time, I also learned to take responsibility at home. I learned how to cook, wash dishes, mop the floor, wash clothes, water plants, and take care of our small kitchen garden. I even enjoyed decorating the plants I grew. My brother knew these tasks too, but he usually woke up late, so I did most of the work by waking up early. Now, in the present, my brother does almost everything. Time really changes people.

It was after my father’s death that Clash of Clans became an important part of my life. At that time, the game was extremely popular. I downloaded it on our Micromax smartphone, a brand that was very popular back then. It was not an expensive phone, but it meant everything to me. Slowly, that small Micromax phone became my whole world.

I started playing Clash of Clans at the end of 2014. What began as a simple game slowly turned into a habit and then into an addiction. From 2014 until mid-2017, I played almost all the time. Whenever I had my phone in my hand, even late at night, I was playing.

Midnight attacks, clan wars, troop training, and waiting for upgrades felt more important than sleep or studies.

My favourite troop was the mighty P.E.K.K.A. To me, it was the strongest ground troop. It was slow, powerful, fearless, and unstoppable. Watching it break through walls and destroy defenses gave me a strange sense of strength. I planned most of my attacks around P.E.K.K.As and waited patiently for them to train.

Gradually, my addiction to the game began to affect my studies. My mother noticed the change and often became angry. Sometimes, out of fear for my future, she even beat me. I studied at St. Joseph’s School, one of the most prestigious schools in the state at that time. Every parent wanted their child to study there, but I failed multiple subjects in that school exams. At that time, students who failed repeatedly were at risk of receiving a Transfer Certificate.

That fear pushed me to study a little, usually late at night. Still, many times, instead of opening my books, I returned to Clash of Clans and fell asleep with my phone in my hand. I often think that if my father had been alive during those years, I would never have lived like that.

My high school life became a mix of everything. There were mistakes, fun, friendships, and problems. I experienced both good and bad moments at home and at school. There were even fights at school, and strangely, I miss those chaotic moments now.

Once, when I was in Class VIII, my mother was called to school by the headmistress because of my poor academic performance. Seeing my mother there because of me made me feel deeply sad and ashamed.

By mid-2017, I finally decided to give up my old habits, including Clash of Clans. I knew I was late, but I also knew that if I continued like that, my future would be ruined. That realization slowly changed me, and I began to focus more seriously on my studies.

I spent 12 years at St. Joseph’s School, and in 2018, I completed my high school education there. Those years shaped me deeply. They were filled with loss, escape, addiction, love, mistakes, and lessons.

Clash of Clans, my Micromax phone, and the mighty P.E.K.K.A will always remind me of a time when I was lost, learning, and slowly finding my way back.

From my perspective, anyone who is addicted to games and feels that it has affected their studies, remember this. You can regain control, even if it takes time. Teenage years are only a phase, and change is possible before your twenties. It is never too late to start again.

Have a great Wednesday !

Late, but wishing you all a Happy New Year 2026 !